Twinkle
(Scene: Monopoly Stadium. The camera pans across the arena before stopping at the commentator booth) Kyle: Hello folks and welcome to this year's annual Monopoly Tournament! Sponsored by the Illuminati. What do you think about the matter, Regan? Regan: This year's tournament is gonna be the biggest yet with Monopolis' very own newcomer soon-to-be-champ SpongeBob SquarePants! He is sure to win, Kyle. Who's your favourite? Kyle: I'm not really the one for favourites but Brittany Ships wins every year so I'll be on her side. Regan: Before the first match, SpongeBob V. Prof. Plum, a special speech from Mr. Monopoly! (crowd cheers as the camera turns to Mr. Monopoly's special seat next to Patrick and Squidward) Mr. Monopoly: Enjoy the match! (more cheers) Patrick: Wow Polly, what a speech! Squidward: It was literally three words! Mr. Monopoly: Well, I'm not one for speeches. Squidward: Well I for one sure am. Colonel Mustard: Hey Jeff! Want some snacks? Mr. Monopoly: No thanks. Say, I can't believe you dropped out of the competition at last minute. Colonel Mustard: Well Plummy thinks he can do better so I signed him up. Go Plum! Prof. Plum: (from arena) Shut up you imbecile! (Geoff rushes up to the four dressed up as someone else selling hot dogs) Geoff: Hot Dogs! Hot Dogs! Come get your Hot Dogs! Squidward: 20 pounds for a hot dog? Geoff: You're also paying for this stand I'm hiring. Patrick: Oh, I'll have fo- Wait a second! I know who you are! Geoff: Gulp. Patrick: You're Donald Trump! Mr. Monopoly: No, he is. (points to Donald Trump who is sitting in the front row) Geoff: So, do you want one or not? Patrick: Yes please! Geoff: So you want one? Patrick: YES! Geoff: You sure? Patrick: HELL YEAH! Geoff: I know, I'll make a deal. A jumbo hot dog for the price of a regular one. Sound good? Patrick: OH SWEET MAMA! Geoff: Follow me then! (he leads Patrick outside of the stadium then scene cuts to Geoff's lab) OK, Patricia. If you would strap yourself in here. (he puts Patrick in a cannon) Patrick: Why do I have to be in here? Geoff: So we can fire the (CENSORED) straight at your mouth. Patrick: I thought I was having a hot dog. Geoff: You are. This one's just female. Patrick: I LOVE WOMEN! Geoff: Oh, you will. (rips off his mask and costume) Patrick: I knew it! It was you all along, Donald Trump! Geoff: (facepalm) No, I'm Geoff. From the barbie at the park last episode, remember? Patrick: (pointing at Geoff) Illuminati confirmed! Geoff: Good thing morons like you don't speak my language. Patrick: Am I still going to get a hot dog. Geoff: Oh of course not. Since you're a star I thought I should put you back where I belong. Patrick: Not at my parent's house! They despised me greatly that they despised me. Geoff: You mean disposed. Patrick: No, despised. Geoff: Let's just put it this way. (to the tune of ABBA's Dancing Queen) You're a star. You should shine. Brightly way up in the sky... And you're friends. Soon you will join. The twinkling star. Ooo-ooh. So, yeah. Thank you, come again! (he presses a button which launches Patrick up into space) Patrick: (offscreen) (Wilhelm scream) Geoff: Now to get the rest. (evil laugh as the scene cuts to a planet far away. Patrick laying face first on the floor struggling for breath. Two people in space suits approach him) Person #1: I told you stars are pink. (the other one hands over twenty pounds and he touches Patrick) Person #2: And I told you stars aren't hot. (#1 gives the twenty pounds back and they laugh) Patrick: (faintly) Finland... Person #1: Oh, he's not a star: he can talk! (he is giving the note back) Patrick: (faintly) Wumbo save Patrick, the noble and victorious Patrick. Everyone loves Patrick. Wumbo save thee. Person #1: (whilst Patrick is faintly speaking) I just can't make out the accent. It seems so familliar but I can't put my finger on it. Person #2: Yeah, nor can I! He looks like an alien but- a human! He's a human! Get a air helmet, Comet! Comet: (runs into a wardrobe and brings out a air helmet and puts it over Patrick's head) There, that's better. Patrick: Guys, I need to get back to Monopolis! Donald Trump put me in a cannon and fired me up here! We need a cannon to get me down, and a bucket of water! (the spacemen laugh) I'm serious! I need to get home! Comet: This is home! You fell from the sky and was born in this planet we call (motorbike engine sfx). Patrick: No, I want to go- Woah. (a shadow covers Patrick's face and Joe enters) Joe: Greetings, I am Joe King. Do not laugh at the starfish 'cos he is truthful. I see all and know all. Patrick: Then what's nine plus- (Joe interupts) Joe: Let's make a deal, Patrick. If you can beat me at a monster battle in an hour, I will send you home. But if I win, you'll be stuck here until you can beat me. OK? Good!